I can still remember my first night on the streets. I had no money to get any lodgings.
My mind was playing havoc with the thoughts of how I got there. I got kicked out of the house by my family. I realize now why it happened. I was always causing trouble for them, ever since I was young. Drinking, smoking, stealing, you name it.
I suppose they finally got tired of looking after me. It’s always like this, getting woken up by a policeman so I don’t clutter the streets for when the normal people are passing by. The first thing I do is go to a nearby public toilet to relieve my bowels.Then my grumbling stomach lulls me too nearby shop. I buy a simple breakfast, consisting of a bacon sandwich and some coffee, with the little bit of money left from yesterday.
After I finish eating, I lust sit there trying to get as much warmth In me as I can for the grueling day ahead. Just a few minutes later, the man behind the counter starts giving me dirty looks, I get them all the time considering I’m a dirty homeless guy. I guess it’s time for me to leave. As I’m walking out, I see the reflection of a man staring back at me. Mangy black hair, hollow dirt covered face and haunting cobalt blue eyes.I’m completely efferent to how I was a few years ago. The streets do that to you. As I walk out I think about the first thing I have to do, an interview for a Job.
If it goes anything like the last interviews I had, it will be disastrous. When I get there, the interviewer takes one scornful look at me and I can see in his eyes that I’m not going to get it. Oh well, I’d expected It to go this way. He asks me questions that he knows I won’t be able to answer. Where do I live? What qualifications do I have? Why do I want the Job? What can I bring to the Job? I couldn’t answer those questions well of course.What was I opposed to say? That I live on the streets? That I don’t have any qualifications? That I want the job so I don’t have to sleep unfed for days? So I can get a proper house? So I can have a life? That I wont actually have anything that I can bring to them? I end up walking out having made a fool of myself.
When I leave the place, disheartened, I walk to the nearby shopping centre. It looks to be a bit crowded so I might be able to make some money. I walk in and pick my spot, a wall near the middle of the shopping centre, so that I’ll be easily seen by the passerby.I set up my things, the thin sheet or me to sit on and a tin box for people to put money in. I feel so uncomfortable doing this.
It’s so degrading. After all this time, Eve finally got comfortable enough to actually do this. The first few nights on the streets, I couldn’t beg for money. Pride got the better of me back then. After a while, the pride got washed away with the tears and the pain caused by living rough. I get as comfortable as I can and get ready for the next few hours. A few people walk by putting a bit of money in the box. They get a quiet gratitude Trot me.
“l nana you”, I always say.Most AT ten people Just walk Dye thou even giving me a glance. It’s as if I’m invisible to the world. I guess it’s not a good day for me. After an hour of this, I pack my things. It’s time to mingle with the crowd.
This is what gets the most reaction. Be it good or bad. There are some people who give me a bit of loose change. There are some who like before, don’t give me anything at all. Then there are those who I am thankful of the most, those few that actually give me proper money.
Some of them get all flushed up when I ask them for money and either walk on or give me everything in their pockets.After a few hours hen the people are starting to disperse, I give up begging and go to a shop to eat something for dinner with the money Eve collected. After that I head out to start looking for a good spot for the night. It seems like the fates are against me and I don’t find a good spot after walking along a few streets. I finally find a wide shop doorway that will be okay in sheltering me from the elements. I get out my thin sleeping bag; get comfortable in it, if you can call it comfortable, with the cold concrete floor making my body ache. After giving the street around me one last look, I let my alert mind slip into oblivion.